Rejection, Motivation, and Awesomeness

I should be embarrassed to still have this

What you see is a message from my now defunct Myspace music page, circa 06. [I call it defunct, but it’s still there – I just do absolutely nothing with it like 99% of the former Myspace users.] This message is the response to my solicitation of an “expert opinion” about the music posted on said page. The expert opinion came from 88 Keys, a hip-hop producer whose discography includes work for: Mos Def, Talib Kweli, Macy Gray, Beanie Siegel, and most recently Kanye West and Jay-Z on Watch the Throne. I don’t remember what songs were on the page at that time, but I’m pretty sure that I liked them. No. I’m certain that I liked them, and that I regarded them as unpolished gems of immeasurable worth. So, thinking that I had royal gems, I went to get them appraised…and the appraiser said they were rocks.

I actually remember the day clearly. I logged in to my page and was delighted that I had received a response. I did not expect a successful producer to take the time to respond to my request. So with trepidation and excitement I opened the message: “The writing's ok but the flow, voice & beats leaves much to be desired. Aight... Chill!”

My heart sank. He said that I sucked. But the bitter pain of the rejection was quickly replaced with disgusted anger for his corny valediction: “Aight... Chill!” I am fully aware that anger is a defense mechanism, but still… Who says that?

Anyway, I resolved to make Mr. Keys eat his words one day when he came begging to produce a song for me. Childish? Of course. But, this dismissal of my talent was motivation – and for the next couple of weeks I would open it periodically. The first few times, I felt the gut punch all over again and the feelings of anger, rejection, motivation, and vengeance would wash over me. Soon enough, I forgot about the whole thing.  The motivating desire for vindication faded, and I went back to living life exactly as I had before.  I made more songs afterwards and enjoyed them immensely. And never once did I feel Mr. Keys’ cold gaze of judgment.

At the end of the day “expert opinions” are like any other opinion – pretty much disposable. They have only as much power as you give them. You set the value of your own gems, and defy anyone to appraise them otherwise. You are the only critic that matters and your personal desire for your own awesomeness is the only motivation that matters. Aight... Chill!! (see?)

Excuses are not awesome at all – Run through them

Zombies don't accept excuses

This morning as I was driving into work, it was pouring rain. As I approached my favorite stretch of road that cuts between a forest preserve and passes over the highway, I saw a man running – an older man, likely in his 60s. Let me remind you, its pouring rain. I drive past the man slowly and wonder does he want to get out of the rain? Did he begin running and get caught and is now too far from home? Is he so far that his only choice is to keep running?  I drove for another eighth of a mile before I got worried that this guy might catch pneumonia, and turned around to ask if he needed a ride*. I turned around and parked on the only bit of road that was large enough to be a proper shoulder. He approached, keeping his pace. I rolled down my window and he stopped, pushed a button on his watch, and smiled as I offered to drive him somewhere. He replied, “It started raining on Mile 1, and this is Mile 6. So…I’m going to keep going.” He smiled, thanked me for my kindness, pushed a button on his watch, and started running again.

I have no idea how many miles this man continued to run after we parted ways. But I do know that he was only 1 mile from home when it started raining.  And I met him – in the rain – 5 miles later.  I am certain that even the best of us would have considered turning around once the rain started. And of those, some would have turned around.  And we would have had a very reasonable excuse. But this man, knowing that there was far more road to travel forward than backward, kept going forward. For that, he is awesome.

*while it’s not relevant to the story, when I made the decision to turn around, I saw a big pretty rainbow. And when I turned to head back towards the runner, I saw another rainbow in the opposite direction. Rainbows are perfectly normal natural occurrences, but I’m still the sort of person who ascribes meaning to things like that. 

Awesomeness Takes Time

Don't watch me, watch the clock. BOYYEEE!! You know what time it is!!

We would all like to believe that we were born awesome. And to some degree we are absolutely correct. When we first arrive as crying, slobbering masters and mistresses of manipulation, the world literally revolves around us. Furthermore, the universe is merely an extension of us and only exists as we interact with it.  But as we get older, we develop a sense of self that differentiates us from the universe that was formerly our appendage. And that’s when awesomeness becomes more complex.

A couple years ago, I read a book called Outliers: The Story of Success by Malcolm Gladwell.  I had even gone as far as to begin writing a blog post about it for the 1^st failed incarnation of The Awesomeness Consultant. It went like this:

Today’s Inspiration for Awesome: Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell
[Imaginary Scene: A young Awesomeness Consultant stands before his 4^th grade classmates, clutching papers tightly and shuffling from foot to foot] 

Good morning, my name is the Awesomeness Consultant and this is my book report on Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell.  Mr. Gladwell has written three other famous books that I haven’t read yet named What the Dog Saw, Blink and the Tipping Point.  I think that Outliers was a good book that presented some interesting information that hold interesting implications for awesomeness…

[End Scene] 

Pardon me for being silly, but yeah this is your basic book report.  Mr. Gladwell makes some interesting arguments and presents some interesting facts that I think would help any of us look at this thing called success differently.  I don’t where success fits into everyone’s “awesomeness paradigm” but as far as my own is concerned – it deserves some attention. Allow [me] to go through the book and highlight a few sections and the implications for awesomeness… 

Chapter Two: The 10,000 Hour Rule
Implication for Awesomeness: Awesomeness takes a lot of time invested

And this is exactly where that blog post ended. I never finished it. So now we’ve come full circle.

Since reading the book, I’ve actually heard the 10,000 hour rule mentioned a number of times. Most recently, I was reading a Men’s Health article about Georges St. Pierre, and in addition to quoting Bruce Lee and Michaelangelo, he mentions the 10,000 hour rule. So what does the rule say? To master anything, it will take a person 10,000 hours. That’s a lot of hours. Let me put it into perspective for you:

Pick anything that you want to master. For me, it would be…ummm…I don’t know….maybe White Lotus Kung Fu (for the sake of discussion). Now let’s break 10,000 hours down:

• If I practiced 2 hours per day, 5 days a week it would take 20 years to reach 10,000 hours.
• If I practiced 4 hours per day, 5 days a week it would take 10 years to reach 10,000 hours.
• If I practiced 3 hours per day, 7 days a week it would take 9 years to reach 10,000 hours.
• If I practiced 4 hours per day, 7 days a week it would take 7 years to reach 10,000 hours.

From that perspective, awesomeness (as defined as mastery of a craft or skill) takes an incredibly long time. As well, to commit to 10,000 hours of practice requires motivation, dedication, and humility. That is one heckuva formula.

Now, you may not have invested 10,000 into any particular craft or skill, and you may not want to. That does not limit your ability to be awesome one bit. By the time you reach 30 years old, you will have been yourself for 262,800 hours. Just being who you are has given you mastery 26 times over.  So actually, awesomeness is still as simple as it was when we were babies. It just takes time for us to realize it.