Being Awesome Even When You Don’t Feel Like It

Ralphie does not feel like being awesome right now - although he plainly is

Friday night 5pm EST – You’ve just finished a week long workshop in Ohio that taxed your mental resources.  You’ve had long days and restless nights in a Holiday Inn Express. However, you conquered. You are awesome.

Friday night 6pm EST – You’ve now found time to unwind and eat with another workshop participant who hails from Canada. You discover some hot wings at the perfect level of spice that’s just before your threshold for uncomfortable.  You’ve paired them with some double breaded mozzarella sticks that are the size of giant’s thumbs. You’ve skipped your workout for the night, but its cool because you are still awesome.

Friday night 8pm EST – The workshop participant turns out to be a like-minded individual. You engage in 3 hours of great conversation about movies, music, and books with this like-minded individual from Canada.  In the course of conversation, LMIC (like-minded individual from Canada) informs you that there have only been 2 murders in the last decade in his province and they were front page news for months. You are almost embarrassed to inform him that Chicago sets the benchmark for murders. The crime rate in the US is not awesome, which makes it your polar opposite.

Friday night 11:30pm EST – LMIC introduces you to an invite-only torrent site. You believe this to be the tool to enable you to become the pirate king that you’ve always dreamed of becoming.  LMIC is awesome and has now contributed to your increasing awesomeness. You are disgustingly awesome.  At this point, you notice a text message from a friend/co-worker warning that you need a “big time heads up” about what to expect when you return to the office on Monday.  You reply with an incredulous “What?!!” but are not too concerned because you are literally bathing in awesomeness right now.

Friday night 11:40pm EST – F/CW has replied that you need to call him tomorrow – which is Saturday, to discuss the situation that demands he put in a full day of work on Sunday.  You would have de-evolved from awesomeness if it were not for the fact that you are still about to become the Pirate King.

Saturday morning 12:15am EST – LMIC has you up and running – you have become Atomsk. You and LMIC surf YouTube introducing each other to music for the next 2 hours. You even take him to your now defunct Myspace Music page to hear some of your old songs which he digs. You have breathed life into the awesomeness of days past.  Time is no longer linear, its simultaneously occurring in multiple dimensions in an unbroken loop.  LMIC explains how in his hometown “magic mushrooms” grow in people’s backyards in October.  Although you are not a psychedelic drug user, this fact along with the non-existent crime rate and the free health care make Canada sound pretty awesome.

Saturday morning 7:30am EST – Although your flight home isn’t until the early afternoon and you have absolutely nowhere to be, you’re wide awake. And this is in spite of the fact that you did not fall asleep until 3:30am EST. But, you are a machine and awesomeness is one heckuva drug.

Saturday morning 8:00am EST – You check your email. You have received an email from your boss regarding the situation that F/CW wanted to warn you about.  The word “disappoints” was used. You’re not awesome.

Saturday morning 8:30am EST – You don’t feel like writing a thing.  You don’t have any inspiration to offer, and you feel like you’ve set yourself up to fail. You sit at the laptop and start writing your blog.  You title it “Being Awesome Even When You Don’t Feel Like It.”  You attempt to exercise awesomeness under duress.

Saturday morning 10:15am EST – You finish writing your post.  You are the Awesomeness Consultant….and the Pirate King.